Sunday, July 10, 2011

An EPIC mass character interview


Okay, well, technically, it's a tag. But I want this to be fun, er, funner, so I'm going to break all the rules.

I'm going to be totally informal and treat this like a super-epic virtual interview.

hee hee.

Anyway, Marian over at all that is gold did this tag and tagged anyone and everyone who wanted to do it.

That included little ol' moi.

It's a Character Questionnaire thingy, where you chose three characters, make them answer the following questions, and then tag other people.

Fun, yes? I thought so.

So, let us continue.

This is where breaking the rules starts.

I couldn't choose only three characters, and I'm in the mood for a big character party, so here come not three, but five of my old pals:

-good old Chance. (Click here if you'd like to do some homework and see how his first interview went! You'll be in on some jokes if you do.)

-a fairly new character named Ted from a current screenwriting project. (Click here for his first introduction on this blog.)

-his friend named Kyle.

-an old, old friend named Luke Firestar, altered and renamed Daniel Tilchaest, from my first-novel-pre-2010 NanoWrimo-days. Nice to see you, dear. (no, I'm not being weird, calling him dear. He's a very, very dear character to me.)

- his sister, originally called Leslie Firestar, altered and renamed Keziah Tilchaest. It's good to see you again, sweetheart.

*fights nostalgia and almost fails*

PS- please, nobody steal Daniel and Keziah's last name. 'Tis under copyright. Thanks all ;)

So.... let it begin! And keep track if you can! :P It's really long...... on accident...... :P

PPS: If you wanted to see how this tag is supposed to be done, read Marian's first. Hers is super funny, btw.


Interviewer: It's great to have you all here! Thanks for coming. 
Ted: No prob. A break in the monotony is always good. 
Kyle: What monotony?

Luke: *tries to bow, but sitting on a couch smashed in between people is problematic* A pleasure, sir. 

Kyle: What monotony?
Leslie: *smiles broadly* Thank you, actually, because if you hadn't called for an interview with us, we would still be gathering dust. *she glances around nervously* No disrespect to the author, of course.......
Kyle: *jabs Ted in the ribs* What monotony?
Ted: *ignores Kyle*

Interviewer: Do you want a hug?
Ted: *eyes widen* Are- are you talking to me?

*Chance runs in, appearing flustered* 
Chance: Sorry people, the bus was late. Flat tire, or something. *He nudges Kyle aside and sits in between him and Leslie, doing a wary once-over on his surroundings.*

Kyle: Dude, I would LOVE a hug.

Leslie: *eyebrows crinkle* If you really want to give me one.... you aren't hiding any weapons, are you? Because if you are....
Luke: Les, that's not very nice of you! Give him a break, he's just an interviewer.
Leslie: What's that?
Luke: I.... I don't know. But he seems fine to me. 
Leslie: Do they have anything to do with trampolines?
Luke: Ask Jaiwin and Trad when we get back, 'kay sis?

Interviewer: *watches*

Chance: *points to bruise on shoulder* Please, no hug. I appreciate the sentiment anyway though.
*He pulls a cell phone, which happens to be the author's phone, from his tattered bag. He puts the bag on the floor. It almost falls apart from wear.*
Chance: .....ten new messages.......

Interviewer: Do you have any kids?

Kyle: Nope. 
Ted: *almost falls off of the couch* Uh, nooo...

Chance: ....I wish he would stop sending me those stupid text messages.....

Luke: No, not me.
Leslie: *giggles and blushes* Ah, no. Sorry.

Interviewer: No, that's fine. 

Leslie: Do you have any?

Interviewer: Yeah! Actually, I have four- three girls and a boy.

Leslie: Aw! How old are they?

Interviewer: Um, five, eight, and my two oldest are twins, age 12.

Leslie: Aw, that's very sweet. *she gestures to Luke* Luke and I are twins, too...

Chance: *still looking at phone* Dude, people, are we going to get on with this interview or what?
Kyle: *rolls his eyes* You aren't even participating.
Chance: So? I'm here.
Kyle: Whatever, man. And since when do you say "Dude."?
Chance: Are you limiting my vocabulary?
Kyle: No, I'm just saying, it's kind of weird.... you're like from, what, Medieval England?
Chance: So?
Kyle: So, people from back then didn't say "dude."
Chance: YOU aren't the author, so you better--

Interviewer:  Hold off, boys, we gotta move on with this. Okay,  here's the big question: 
Have you killed anyone?

Chance: *tucks phone away* Now we get serious. *he scrunches up his face in thought* Nah, I haven't killed nowt. *his face clouds over* Actually..... never mind. *scowling, he crosses his arms and tucks himself as far into the couch as possible*

Kyle: What's his problem?

Chance: Come off it. 

Interviewer:  Fellas, stay on topic.....

Ted: Wha-what do you think I am, a serial killer?
Kyle: *laughs* Do killing people in video games count? 

Leslie: *wrinkles nose* Games?? You call killing a GAME? Listen, if you knew what I've had to do to stay alive.... *her fists start clenching and unclenching*
Luke: Leslie, hold off there.....
Leslie: *scowls at interviewer* I hope that question wasn't meant to be taking a stab at anyone here who's killed people, because let me tell you- YOU try living in a region that's completely overrun by war and NOT kill anyone! *growls*

Luke: Don't mind her......

Kyle: Can we change the subject, please?

Interviewer: Um, okay. So, do you love anyone?

Chance: THAT was a change in direction..... 
Kyle: You're avoiding the question again.
Chance: So are you.

Ted: *coughs* I completely fall head over heels for this girl. That's what my story's about, so yeah....
Kyle: *nudges Ted and giggles*

Leslie: *looks over at Luke*
Luke: *tries to look innocent but is turning super red*
Leslie: He's only half aware of it, but he's going to fall madly in love with a friend of mine. *she giggles* They're gonna be sooo cute.
Luke:  *puts a hand over his eyes* The author only speculated and outlined that, so you can't say anything...
Leslie: Yes I can.
Luke: NO, you can't.
Leslie: I did.
Luke: *puts face in hands* ..aaaaaaaaggghghghgh......

Chance: *glances over at Luke and Leslie and cracks up* You guys are hilarious. 

Luke: *sarcastically* Thank you. 

Interviewer: What is your job?
Kyle: I'm the president.

Ted: *snorts* BWAAHAhahahhaha!!!

Leslie: What's  a president?

Chance: How would you not know??

Ted: Chance, you shouldn't know, you're from like, 11th century England or something right?

Kyle: That's what I said.

Chance: So? Maybe I'm clever.

Kyle: *groans* No matter HOW clever you think you are, you haven't invented the time machine.

Chance: Alright. Then how are we all sitting here?

Luke: *wearily* Boys, we're in the author's brain, you know.

*Kyle and Chance's eyes go round and their jaws drop.*

Kyle/Chance: ...really......?????

Leslie: *moans* You guys really are pathetic.
Kyle: *tears his hair out* You mean I'm just a synapse in some person's head?
Chance: *at a loss for words* I....I...... ahhhhhh...... *goes into shock*

Luke: *pretends like nothing happened* To get back on topic, actually, I'm currently in the circle of the highest leaders in my region. 

Leslie: But aren't the rest of them going to get assassinated, leaving you and me some of the few left alive?

Luke: WhAt?

Leslie: I eavesdropped on the author's thoughts the other day.

Luke: Was that actually a certified thought? 

Leslie: It looked official.

Luke: Has it made it onto paper yet?

Leslie: Getting close, but no.

Luke: *looks ready to fall apart* Oh... dear...... *puts his head in his hands.* It's practically official.......

Interviewer: Ted, do you have a favorite season?
Ted: How come you're only asking me?

Interviewer: Look at those two- Kyle and Chance- they look like... I don't know, depressed, like really depressed, or dead or something.  Chance looks like he's in shock. And Luke seems to be in distress, so you're the only one left in their right mind.

Leslie: Hey! I'm fine!
Ted: You should see the steam coming out of your ears.....
Leslie: *glares*
Ted: Um, well... spring is nice, I guess.
Leslie: Autumn makes me happy.

Interviewer: Who’s your best friend?
Leslie: *jabs thumb at Luke* He's the only one on that list that is still alive, anyway. *grins wryly* Just kidding. I mean, I haven't lost anyone like that yet.

Ted: I don't really have one... Kyle is close, but he's too irritating too much of the time.
Kyle: ......ooohhhhh............
Chance: *still has blank/dead look on his face*  Tully. Even though I never know when he's going to pop up. He's my best friend. Only friend, mostly. The author is making me say all of this, isn't she? I'm not really making any decisions, am I? Ooooooohhhhhhhhhh......... *hides head in hands*
Luke: But who would try to kill them?? It-- it!!!! ARGH! It's practically official....... 

Interviewer: Oh dear. Hobbies?
Ted: Trying to find one, I guess.

Leslie: Giving people a hard time. Speaking of which: want me to smack these people back into their senses or what?

Interviewer: If you want, I guess.

Leslie: *bashes Kyle and Chance's heads together* *nudges Luke and whispers something*

Kyle: We will fight them on the beaches! We will fight them--!

Chance: Knock it OFF, man! You're making my head hurt. Good grief. 

Leslie: See they're all back to normal.

Ted: Er..... Kyle seems a little off his rocker still.

Leslie: Afteraffect. It'll wear off.

Luke: Les..... you mean..... I could....... wha......?
Leslie: We'll talk later Luke. 

Interviewer: What are you going to do when this tag is over?
Chance: Crawl into a hole and die.....

Interviewer: No, really. What are you going to do??

Chance: Um, probably sit around and wait for something to happen. The author's all over Ted and Kyle right now. I'm gathering dust. *rolls eyes in Kyle's direction*

Leslie: Luke and I will probably do the same thing, actually. Been doing it for years now.

Kyle: Did you seriously say "Luke and I?"" Man, you actually bother with grammar??

Leslie: *arches eyebrow* 

Interviewer: What's your eye color?
Chance: Hazel-green-gold, like my mother's. Not that I know her...... *drifts off sadly*

Ted: Dunno. It doesn't matter. Whoever plays me will have whatever eyes they have.
Kyle: Same here.

Leslie: What's that supposed to mean?? Plays you??

Kyle: We're of a different kind of story. You are from a novel. We're from a screenplay.

Leslie: *eyes widen* Oh, wow..... I see. I've never met someone from a screenplay before. *sits back and nods thoughtfully* No wonder I can't tell your eye color or any distinctive features on either of you..... *she sits back and studies Kyle and Ted* Very interesting. Mine are brown, but my Keziah version has gorgeous sapphire eyes. They're to die for, honestly. *grins*

Luke: They're blue-green. But my Daniel version has super dark grey eyes, but sometimes they look very dark brown. Kinda cool, but it's mostly because the author can't decide what color they should be... *chuckles*

Interviewer: Interesting. OK, are you good? Or bad?
Kyle: Depends on what I'm not.

Ted: *rolls eyes*
Chance: That's a lame question.
Leslie: Seriously, you except us to answer that?
Luke: *serious face* Are you kidding? I'm good, totally. *bursts out laughing*

Interviewer: Okay, okay, moving on. What is your greatest fear?
Leslie: That I'll never get written about again. Sometimes, it seems that the author has forgotten all about us..... *sniffs*

Luke: I'm afraid of what will happen if our co-leaders die..................
Ted: For Kyle's blind date he arranged for me to be a nightmare. Ugh.
Kyle: Never getting past Level 12. 
Chance: Your worst fear has to do with a video game? *shakes head* Mine is........ it's a dragon. 
Kyle: Sweet. 
Chance: No, it's really not.
Kyle: If you have double attack power you'll be fine.
Chance: *gets up* I'm leaving, people. I can't do this anymore. *stomps away*

Interviewer: You really should stay for this next question: What do you think of your parents?
Ted: Um, they're fine??

Kyle: Same.

Leslie: Don't know who they are, er, were....
Luke: Same. 

Chance: I'm still leaving!! (Author's note: One is dead and the other is now in a convent. Please pity him.)

Interviewer: Any siblings?
Luke: *points to Leslie*

Leslie: *points to Luke*
Kyle: One older brother and sister, two younger twins, both girls, and a little brother. 
Ted: Wow. Um, I've got a younger sister.

Interviewer: Was it fun to answer all these questions?
Leslie: Sure, why not?

Luke: I guess...
Ted: It was fine.
Kyle: Some were funner than others. 

Interviewer: Do you have any weaknesses?
Kyle: Never.

Ted: Yeah, right.
Luke: I overthink everything..... does that count?? I either overthink or I don't think at all.

Interviewer: Your favorite element? 
Kyle: Shoot, fire of course. Duhr.

Ted: Oh, like elements like those Avatar cartoons? Water's fine I guess.
Leslie: We're kinda big on wind, Luke and I.
Chance: *pops back in* The element of surprise. 
Kyle: Sur-prise. *rolls eyes and scoots over to let Chance sit back down* Missed us already?

Interviewer: Do you care what others think of you?
Leslie: Not really.

Luke: I like to be on people's good side....

Kyle: All that matters is I can get to Level 22 in one day.
Ted: No you can't! We're roommates. I should know.

Chance: I just discovered a thought- it was official and on paper, everything. It's being saved for the next draft....... thanks for telling me how to do that, Leslie. *winks* Anyway, in context of the thought I just found.... I don't really care, or at least I pretend not to. -_- (<-- face he is making right now)

Interviewer: Your theme song?
Luke: I don't know. Probably something from Star Wars....

Leslie: I always thought I had something from Lord of the Rings or maybe that Irish 'Westering Home' song...

Luke: Aaawwwwwwww, I wanted that one!!!! *pouts*

Kyle: Assassins Creed music.

Ted: Some Justin Bieber song I'm sure... *sobs*

Chance: The author likes listening to the Dear Wendy soundtrack when writing about me.... as well as the Pillars of the Earth album. Yeah. However, "I'm Still Here" from Treasure Planet and "Once In Every Lifetime" from Eragon are good as well. 

Kyle: Way to show off.

Interviewer: Heh. What’s your species?
Kyle: Assassin.

Ted: *snorts* Person.

Chance: Human, you mean.

Ted: Yeah, that's what I said.

Leslie: Human I guess....

Luke: *nods*

Interviewer: Well, thanks a lot everyone. I really appreciate it.
All: No problem.
*they dissipate and vanish*


Are you still reading???

You deserve a prize.


Hope you were amused :]

Thanks again to Marian for a fun tag. I don't know about you, but I had fun writing it. Dunno if it was half as fun reading, though.....

I tag anyone who wishes to be tagged. Please see Marian's post for the original format :D 


Anonymous said...

Haha, thanks for the prizes! I LOVED reading it, it was hilarious. xD All the different characters, all mashed together = priceless. xD This would probably be very fun to do at some point, I'll keep it in mind!

Anonymous said...

"Amused" would be taking it lightly. xD This is why I love your blog, Abigail, it never fails to cheer me up.

And this was just brilliant. And hilarious. And wonderful.

"Chance: Are you limiting my vocabulary?"

I about died when I read that. xD Chance was probably my favorite, followed closely by Luke... But all are hilarious and awesome.

Marian said...

What Katie said...I love Chance! And this quote from Luke:

"I overthink everything..... does that count?? I either overthink or I don't think at all."

That is so me. :) Thanks for doing the tag--it was fun to read!!

Anonymous said...

Ha, that tag was hilarious! I love how your characters interact with each other.

-Barriss =)

Anonymous said...

This pretty much made my day! Awesome tag!


Cosette said...

Hahaha!! I looove their reactions when Luke says "We're in the author's brain, you know." XD That was hilarious.

Riah said...

I just did this tag! Man was it fun (and long!). My characters got a little (ok - a lot) out of hand... and they bashed their author! I could erase them if I wished, gosh!
This was fun!! Thanks!

Jedi~Chick said...

That was AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!! xDDDDDDD It was hilarious!!!!!!!!! I wish to be tagged. XDD I love it! Great job!!!!! Sounds like fun. ;)
And...*grabs cookies and pie possessively* Eh what the hey...*grabs trophy too*
Epic post!!!!!!! :D

Everyone's Favorite Composer said...

Maybe I'll do that...

I thought their theme songs (at least some of them) were my compositions... :( <--- I never do faces! See how sad you made me!?

Naw, it's okay. I forgive you.

The "limited vocabulary" part was especially funny.

Vrenith said...

I shall do this tag... but don't expect anything amazing from me. :) I'm not the best when it comes to humor.

Well... maybe if its between Aneth and Lord Dvinstra...

And, like you, I probably won't be able to stick to the rules. >_>


Vrenith said...

Haha! I have now completed this tag. If ye would like to read it (even if it is long and probably not that funny) then go here: