Sunday, February 26, 2012

In Which Dantere's Story Alters Some


I'll write a real "pitch"/"outline" for you guys one of these days. The right words are floating around out there somewhere but I haven't caught them yet.

But I re-started writing it again. 'Tere is fourteen, Keziren is his half-sister, and it's written in first person, past tense. And actually, if all goes to plan I'll be writing the whole series with each chapter alternating Keziren and Dantere's points of views o_O

It scared me to write with a "main" female character. That's actually a funny quirk about me: generally speaking, I dislike reading books with a female main character. Especially if there is no male MC. Same with my writing.

But whatever. I'll learn. :]

Anyway. For now, here's a little excerpt that I scribbled out sometime in the wee hours of this morning ;)

read: completely unedited ;)

DANTERE
   It's not my fault my eyes are unusual. I actually don't know whose fault it is, but it doesn't matter now. I've snuck into Lady Tela's chambers and borrowed her mirrors. I've looked into these eyes myself. I see why people avoid my gaze. It's not their color- they're only grey. One might call them silver. But it's the way they... shimmer. No, that's not the right word. They do something strange. It's as if you put a dragon's eyes into a dog's face: they look like they belong to another creature. 
   Not to flatter myself, but they glow; as if someone took a star right out of the heavens and poured the light into my irises. Not to jest, but they're otherworldly.
   I hate them. 

4 comments:

Charley R said...

Oh my gosh, I'm the same! I think it's because we're girls, and we're so much more critical of the imperfections in other girls. A personal thing is that I find it's always more fun to antagonise male characters, tee hee :P

I also have issues working with characters of my own age group - though that's improving. I just find it hard to bring myself to like female characters better - though once I like them I do get very attached to them, lol! Fantasy settings are also tricky to work with with girls because they fall so easily into hte "rebellious princess", "disguised runaway" or "over-competent implausible origin" categories. Though I'm rather proud of my lead female MC in my fantasy trilogy - I like to think she's a good character, as well as being somewhat more awesome than her half brother (my MC, lol!)

Haha, oh I love that quote! Dantere sounds like the kind of person I'd like to meet, hee hee! Best of luck with your rewrite! We can has extracts? Pweez?

Miriam Forster said...

Oooo! I like it!

I wish my eyes did a shimmery-glowy thing. Then I could stare at people and unnerve them. :)

Hannah Joy said...

Awesome! I lovelovelove the excerpt! And about writing about girls--totally. Agree. I wrote about a girl for my NaNovel last year and it didn't work out as good as writing about boys for some reason. *sigh* Can't comprehend why, though I think Charley might have hit upon it....

The Director said...

Thank you, you lovely people! :)

It's funny how us girls are. Guy authors seem to have no trouble writing about guys xD